I spent a long time thinking i would go without friends, that my mood will remain low and socially i would fade into nothing but an echo from the back of the room, voice harsh from not speaking. My mama, however, would not let that happen. She called E's parents.
E apologized to me the next day but this time i felt like i could do better than her, i deserved more than her. Her words still volt through me each time my heart beats, most of the time it's not even being called "chavy" or a "slag" but flashbacks of how i dealt with it.
Laddered tights
I remember coming back from school upset (as i did a lot those days, a Wednesday) I went into my bedroom sat on my bed listening to the song "someone like you" By Adele. Fascinated by the ladder in my tights i pulled and created more and more while i let my tears flow free. As anger set in i tore holes. Why did she say that? Do i deserve it? Do other people think that?
Am i fat?
Needless to say my tights were left in shreds. But sitting on my bed crying isn't the main way i dealt with being bullied, E's words had manifested much deeper than tears.
I will write third chapter soon, the next is going to be juicy...
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