Is it bad that I just want to go into a deep hole with my
duvet to cry and sleep? Maybe sometimes listening to sad songs to make me extra
sad.
I’m not always sad, I don’t know if I’m even sad, but I’m
know I’m not happy. No one knows this, no
one has ever delved into the depth on my mind to see what’s there. I don’t let
them. My mind is not pretty or cute as I make myself out to be. I think
horrible horrible things and I’m not proud of any of it. And it brings me down;
the fact that I dwell on nothing and everything without being able to channel
my thoughts. I’m a mess.
And I don’t let others worry about me, talking to a friend on
facebook consisted of me briefly explaining an issue that makes me cry but
ending the sentence with “but enough with my problems, is everything ok with
you?”.
I’m afraid people will judge me for the things I think, so I carry
on with my innocent persona.
(copied and pasted from my diary)
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